Don’t Mess With a Little Old Lady
By Terry Miller
Published: Thursday, February 4th, 2010
By Dorothy Denne
Am I little? Well not exactly, but then, it depends on whom you compare me to.
Am I a lady? Well sometimes. Depends on what the occasion calls for.
Am I old? Yep. Then again, depends on whom you compare me to. Hopefully I’ll get even older, but I am old.
So, I guess I’m enough of all of the above to qualify for the moniker of Little Old Lady. That I guess qualifies me to pass along the following story I received in my e-mail with the instructions to pass it along to brighten someone’s day.
A little old lady gets pulled over by a policeman….
Little Old Lady: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma’am, you were speeding.
Lady: Oh, I see.
Officer: May I see your license please?
Lady: I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.
Officer: Don’t have one?
Lady: Lost it four years ago for drunk driving.
Officer: I see…Can you show me your vehicle registration papers please?
Lady: I can’t do that.
Officer: Why not?
Lady: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Lady: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Lady: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.
The officer looks at the little old lady and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes five police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle please?
The little old lady steps out of her vehicle.
Lady: Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Lady: Stole the car and murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of the car?
The lady opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma’am?
Lady: Yes, here are my registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.
Officer 2: My officer claims that you do not have a driving license.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer 2: Thank you ma’am. One of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Lady: I bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
Don’t Mess With Little Old Ladies!
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